Jennifer on June 15th, 2010

Yes, I’ve said it.

I really do think I hate her. But I didn’t always hate her, I actually once really loved most things about her. I always thought her little pop tunes were cute and fun. I think her song of Hot and Cold is COMPLETELY on target, and for that alone, I liked her.

But then…. this obsession by the boy became…. ~finding the words~ More than an obsession? Over the top?

And so here is the million dollar question, when does something like this cross the line of being down right disrespectful?

Now, don’t get me wrong, it’s not like the boy is a disrespectful person, but rather, just oblivious to anything and anyone but himself most days. I can’t blame him. A lifetime of being alone will do that to you I suppose.

But, what ever happened to telling your partner how hot they are? I understand that we all want to jump Matthew McConaughey and Katy Perry like there is no tomorrow, but would you ever really point that out at every sighting of them if you knew it feed insecurities?

What ever happened to doing the right thing? To breaking down and sending the quick I love you message, or the thank you, or the I think you are special message? Or making the call to just say I was thinking about you?

And when you can no longer do that, does it mean things are bad or wrong, or does it just mean that things are now comfortable enough that you take those thoughts for granted?

Either way, I wish bad things on Katy Perry, and I hope that doesn’t make me a bad person.

Love & Peace

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Jennifer on June 12th, 2010

Change is good, right?

After all, isn’t that what started this whole blogging nonsense in the first place?

But, sometimes, change simply doesn’t feel good.

And that’s where I’m at with the new boy. It’s like an overnight, day and night difference. Once affectionate, loving, kind. The next distant, cold and somewhat mean spirited.

And the million dollar question….

What causes us to change like that. Not just in love, but in friendships, jobs, music, sports and food?

Is it an internal switch, outside factors….

Is it deliberate? Or are we simply, fully unaware when these things happen to us?

I don’t think any of these questions will really help me feel an answer to the question of the moment that pains me, but I always try to compare one situation to others, I think it opens insight and perspective. Is there a correlation to why I feel this way in this situation to how I’ve felt in past situations? Learning from history, learning from others’ mistakes, and successes… I suppose that is our best teacher?

love and peace

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Jennifer on June 8th, 2010

Well, they’ve left.

And yes, I’m a little sad. I’m also very relieved to be back to “normal”, whatever that is.

Now I can be off and running, at a more normal pace, for whatever else it is that is in store for me.

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Jennifer on May 30th, 2010

I am a fortunate soul. And thankful for it.

It’s been another year, New York. And I still love you.
And I still hate you. But mostly, I love you dearly.

It might help that I am also very very much in love with myself too.
Oh yeah, and that little detail of being madly in love with the boy too.
That might help things.
Sorry, New York, but don’t be jealous. He loves you too.

Love and peace,
Niff

Jennifer on May 25th, 2010

And the adventure begins….

My Mom and Gene have arrived into Port Washington for a two week stint of experiencing my so called life.

This should be interesting…

We have a lot of things planned, and I’m looking forward to getting to enjoy some cool stuff with them, but I’m also not sure how two weeks with three little people crammed together non stop will turn out.

I know I will love having them here, and will be pretty sad on the inside when they leave, but I believe it will be a pretty good test to my patience too.

I look forward to them meeting the boy. He’s pretty special, and I’d like to think it has more potential than any other relationship that I’ve had.
I know they will love him, but I’m a little worried he’ll still love me after he sees that section of me. Sad, but a little true.

I look forward to them meeting my friends. We are getting ready for quite the BBQ tomorrow, and it will be really the first chance for my parents to actually meet people in my every day life.

I look forward to them seeing some cool NYC stuff that they didn’t get to enjoy last time. The boy is quite the tour guide. Hopefully I never have to hear another word about my Second Rate tour guide abilities again. That joke has worn out it’s welcome.

I look forward to them distracting me from the every day life I live.

Love and Peace

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5K

Jennifer on May 16th, 2010

I completed my first 5K today.

Not much of a feat really. But I suppose it’s because I walked 99% of it.

I did it because I love someone. And that someone loves someone else.

I suppose it’s the thought that counts more than anything.

I had a wonderful time, and I would do it in a heartbeat again. As a matter of fact, I look forward to next year.
Maybe next year I can convince that someone to train, and run most of it instead.

Love & Peace

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Jennifer on April 29th, 2010

I’m Vegas bound baby.

Does there really need to be anything else in this post?!?!

Love, Peace and Good Luck

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Jennifer on April 23rd, 2010

It’s been a very long three weeks.

I don’t know why, but it just has. I think it’s a combination of a lot of things. I don’t really know how to even put it into words. I normally consider myself someone who handles stress rather well, and stays as rational as possible all things considered. Although, I am a woman…

Anyway, I’m not sure that I can really even put my feelings and thoughts into words. I’m pretty certain I don’t even want to. I do however, wish that I knew why this has been happening to me. I’d like to pinpoint and correct. I guess some things just aren’t that easy. I also suppose this: that some things just aren’t worth it. I’ve had a sucky couple of weeks, and we are moving on.

That’s pretty much what this is about.

These are some of the things that cure the sadness in my heart when I least expect it.

Smiles from my friends
my ipod, and the secluded world it brings along with it
driving top down in my convertible. I really do <3 my car. A lot.
Starbucks
retail therapy. Of any kind. I don’t think this is as healthy as some other outlets but ummm… no judging. :)
getting a pedicure.
getting a manicure. these two statements go completely unappreciated by most. they have no clue.
taking pictures
eating strawberries
knowing I will see my parents soon
sneaking out on a lazy friday afternoon to enjoy several of these things at lunch time. :)

<3
and happy friday

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Jennifer on April 9th, 2010

I was raised to believe that anything is possible. That I could do anything I set my mind to. That I could be anything I wanted to be.

And for the most part, I believe this, and live it each day.

But is it really in a realm to think I could possibly become a photographer?!

The list goes on and on of things that I have the skills for. I have tried my very best to develop a very diverse and broad skillset, but never once did that list include photography!

Even saying the word photographer in reference to myself seems like a dirty  name.

Well, I suppose I’ve always been one for a potty mouth, so here goes…

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Jennifer on April 8th, 2010

I love this season. This time of year.

The mornings are so crisp, and energizing. I feel as though the world is endless, and that I have all of the time on the planet at my disposal.

I attended a hockey game last night. I wore a sundress. I drove there with my top down. It was 95 degrees at one point yesterday. This all seems a bit contradictory.  I suppose that in itself is another reason that I really like this season. Both of my favorite sports are both very active, one starting, one finishing.

I think it’s going to rain tomorrow, or possibly even later today.

Boo…

I’d even take a way too cool day over that silly rain. How’s a girl supposed to go Topless in the rain?!?!?!

:)

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